Game 4 – v China (brought to you by guest commentators Bourkey and Fish)

21 Sep 2009, 12:05pm Posted by Coach

Bourkey: It'd been a pretty big day by the time this game rocked around had ‘The Fear' earlier, but now I am just pissed.

Fish: You were definitely pissed. And a tad sunburnt, should have slip, slop, slapped!

B: That's great I am getting sunscreen tips from a Redknob. Not as pissed as you.

F: Sh*t, yep, I was pissed. Still pissed from the night before, or possibly last weekend in Vang Vieng. Or sh*t, can't remember. Anyway, we've been running water all day. Hard work. Especially with a leather akubra on the old loaf of bread - didn't breathe too well.

B: Are you having a laugh? Fish!

F: Have you heard my Ivan Milat joke?

B: Yes mate, we've all heard it and you do look a bit like him. Well done.

F: Anyway, it was the last game. They'd been telling me they were fit, been doing running, but everyone was looking like they could use an oil change and new battery.

B: Apart from the old bloke, he just kept up with it. All day, yelling out: "YOU'RE MINE!", or "YOU'RE F*CKED MATE" and stuff like that. Real scary. Sorta.

F: Yeah, I offered him a beer and he said something about salts, minerals and essential irons. Gaaaawd, what the be-jesus.

B: So the last game was against this mob of assh&les. Not totally, but that Phants guy who wore his shorts really high, so high and tight you could tell his religion, he got into a scrap. Rocket. Would have taken him too. Except he ran out of breath.

F: I ran him over a beer. He was pretty wrapped. Then I ran Langas a beer. The big unit finished clean off and then just smashed the can on his bicep and ran off. Gaawssssh, massive rig.

B: EPIC. So the boys did pretty well in the last game. Rallied a bit, got a few touches, wrapped a few goals, though Marty couldn't kick again and Thommo was looking a bit out of touch playing with a footy that had Arial on it. He was fuming.

F: So I ran him a beer.

B: Good one.

F: That President got a few more touches; Huntsman did some good; everyone had a crack; Rodger kept sinking tinnies on the bench. Merciless.

B: Ran them a beer as well. Had one myself. Smashed.

F: We nearly had them, those red buggers. Some inspirational words at half time, that old fella Hollywood talking about dams and being dammed, I don't know, but it got ‘em revved up. The Phants came out storming, looking like the front row punters at a Boxing Day sale at Bunnings.

B: Mark was limbering up by now for his eating stanza, just adjusting the gut to ensure maximum capacity. Cow-a-bunga looming large in his mind.

F: That ex-Pres missed a few more, perhaps not aided by his wingnut. Ah, what a great day. Another beer, then let's head to the beach.

B: The beach? Its miles away.

F: No..'The Beach'

B: Righto! Don't forget to Slip, Slop, Slap!

F: Keep the dream alive Bourkey.

B: You too Fish.